kugiransays

hmmm...it seems that i need some times to finish up what i had started. since the last word that i wrote i do not have such a pleasant time to make it. if i was not doing my works, i was not at home...going someway and got back at the very middle of the night. and i'm away from my place for 2 days now. hanging around in somebody place. i will write the ending of the tales soon. very very soon as i got back to my realm.

wow...what a tragedy. what a pitty girl. it's something kinda hard to say bout her situation. i believe that there is a man who will accept her as what she was and is. but now the problems that i could see is do she accept herself as what she was and is.

if she found a very nice man who will be by her side as a man, husband and friend for the whole of her life, i'm affraid there is a question will cross-up in her mind. is the man really love her or just feeling sympathy to her. i don't know is this thing happened or not. but from the articles in magazines and from tv drama series, the situation is like this.

may be i can be a good listener, but i feel like i'm no good in giving advice. or may be that i just be too defensive...hmm..i don't know. but what i can give here is just from what i've seen and heard.

things happened. things changed. and things stayed. we cannot change what had happened. we cannot remove what had happened. but we can overcome and twist what had happened.

pain heels. but the "pain" last. as it last, it should be overcome. overcome by something that will keep it away. i believe that she is a very strong girl. and she must keep herself stronger. it will not be easy to left out the memories especially the worst one. she must try to start believe in her own self now. the confidence is what she lacks now. just let herself to see the good of the life instead of the bad. give herself a chance to find a new life. see the brighter side. how innocent the life is.

urrghh...it is really hard to say, man. it is the worst nightmare in women's life, what the living she's in. i cannot thinking of anything else. may be spy leman would have any.

but just let her know that there will 'the one' for here. who will take her as what she was and is. the one who will love her as a girl, a woman, a girlfriend, a wife, and a friend. just give herself a chance to twist what ever had happened.

I wanted to enjoy Neo's Tales of a Magic Tree. A good piece of fiction is a helpful remedy for writer's block. But I just can't work today and I can't enjoy a good piece of fiction today.

My mind keep going back to a story, told to me last night by someone, and it wasn't a fiction, it wasn't a dream, it's real, it happened. And how the person who went through it wished it wasn't.

Here's the story. A girl goes out with another girl - you know, just chillin' out. The other girl met up with her boyfriend. The boyfriend brought a friend.

They all had teh tarik and chatted. Then one of the guys said he wanted to change clothes at the hotel room he's staying in, and invited the whole bunch to lepak there while he change.

Doesn't seem anything's amiss right up to this point, right? But whaddaya know, it turned out that the boyfriend and the girlfriend was in a plot to supply a girl to a customer - the so called friend of the boyfriend.

And so the girl, who thought she's on a simple outing with a girl and her set of friends, was raped. Whacked until she passed out, and woke up with blood coming out of her you know what and cuts and bruises all over.

The girl got scared and overwhelmed with shame. Didn't dare to see the Doc, didn't wanna go to the police, couldn't bear to tell her parents, too ashamed to confide with friends.

So she went through it alone. Mended herself with meagre supply of medicine, pretended in front of the people she knew that everything was OK. At night or when alone in the bathroom, she cried. When she can't weep, she ate, and ate, and ate.

Later she realized that there were risks - internal injuries, pregnancy, and worst, sexually transmitted diseases (STDs). So she went to see a doctor and had gotten herself checked regularly eversince.

Now two years had passed, she's got a good career going, shed off some of the weight she gained from stuffing herself during those times of depression, and more than three guys vying for her attention and TLC.

But she could not accept their offer of love and commitment. She said cause she's no longer a virgin, she's not good enough for anyone. No hymen, no self-respect, no-self-esteem, no self-confidence, no love for oneself.

The evil who did this to her should be apprehended and punished. Cut his dick inch by inch, day by day, smother it with honey and leave him for ants to feed on. As for her mamasan friend and the boyfriend who served as accomplice, I think they deserved to be skinned alive.

This girl asked me which guy would want her now. She thinks the guys who are trying to mengorat her will run away if she tells the truth.

But it wasn't her fault, I said. I wanted to say more, maybe some magical chant that would make her feel better.

I wanted to tell her - surely there's a guy out there who'd accept her for who she is, despite her past - but I am not sure if this is true.

Tell me dear Leman, dear Neo, what can I say to her?

"i wish to meet you tomorrow"...it was a lie then.

back in the city, there was a boy who tried to sell a cow. a very young boy named edward. he lived with his mother and a sister inside a very poor gipsy house. as the only men in the family, he must work hard to help his mother and sister since the death of his father to the wicked crickets. his father was a lumberjack. and as the story told, you might knew what was happened.

he walked to every corner of the city tho sell the cow. his mother told to get the cow sold by the sun set. they need some money to pay for the foods and others.

long long time ago, there was a country in the middle of the midlandshire. this country was well known for her richness of nature's beauty. there were lot of trees and streams laid across the lands.
among those trees there stood a tree on the top of mushroom hill in the heart of dester forest. if a man get to the top of the highest tower in the city, he could see how strong and peaceful the tree was. eventhough the forest was so far away from the city, it still could be seen as the tree was so huge and tall. they was a wishper saying that he was a size of ten men in diameter and could reach as high as one hundred young men. no body knew the exact size of the tree since no body dare to get close to him as the forest was a home of the most dangerous and evil wizard, nohtiays.
from the elderies, it was told that the tree was a magic tree. the skins of him can be used as a heeling poison. his leaves can bring prosperity and wealth to whom who has it. it was still no proves whether the story is true or just a tale.
in order to get to the the mushroom hill, one should cross the field of crickets, where nohtiays's place was located. and there was a never ending mud stream crossing in between the field and the hill. there were several attempts done by the lumberjacks to get up to the hill as there was the place where the best woods in the world grew. but none of them even reached to the bank of the stream. as told by the survived lumberjacks, once they stepped into the field, there were thousand numbers of crickets surrounded them and making strange sounds. and the sounds was terribly blasted their hearing. if one could not get out of the field as soon as he could, he will face his death in there. that is because the sounds made by the crikcet is just not a bug's sounds. it was the sounds of pain and it wil burst out human's brain. they doesn't knew how the sounds killed, but as they survived they still badly wounded. some of them having a very bad hearing problem and some of them were dead after a month.
since then, no body dared to get close to mushroom hill. even to walk by the edge of the field of crickets. every day there would be a huge dark cloud hanged-over above the sky of the field. and once a day, there would be a big black shadow got out from and came in to the wirzard's place. it was a rumor that the shadow was nohtiays as he got out to the mushroom hill to get some materials for his wizardry spells. and at night, once a while an evil laughing could be heard came form the field, and sometimes that were evily lightings and storms could be seen.

to be continued...
(i'm really tired now. wish to meet you tomorrow)

Hola guys! Read this one up... Just a reminder that there's a lot of whackos who make Michael Jackson looks plain innocent out there!

New Straits Times » World

Self-confessed cannibal goes on trial in Germany
AFP

KASSEL, Dec 3: A self-confessed cannibal went on trial in Germany today ac-cused of murdering a victim who was apparently willing to be killed, carved up and eaten in front of a running video camera.

Wed. — Armin Meiwes, a 42-year-old computer technician, was pictured laughing and chatting easily to his lawyer moments before the case opened.

It is the first time Meiwes, dressed smartly in a jacket and tie, has been shown in public since he was arrested a year ago.

The macabre case is unprecedented in German legal history, not only because it concerns cannibalism — which Meiwes admits to — but because the victim was, by all accounts, a willing accomplice in his own death.

Cannibalism is not itself a crime under German law. Prosecutors say that, despite his 43-year-old victim's apparent "death wish", Meiwes is guilty of murder for sexual satisfac-tion and liable to life in prison.

Defence lawyers argue that, at worst, he is guilty of "killing on demand", which would be pu-nishable by up to five years in prison.

The case has gripped Germany since it was re-vealed last year, some 16 months after the incident in March 2001.

Meiwes, who has admit-ted his actions to investi-gators, has expressed re-grets over his deed.

He has said he made contact with his victim, Bernd Juergen Brandes, on the Internet after advertising for someone willing to be killed and eaten. Brandes travelled to his house near Kassel, where Meiwes cut off his penis, which they partially ate together.

Then Meiwes stabbed him, carved up the body, ate some of the flesh, stored some more in a deep-freeze for later consumption and buried bones and a skull in his garden.

The whole scenario was recorded on video, again with the apparent agreement of Brandes. In an interview released yesterday, Meiwes said it was not a case of murder because Brandes "used me as a tool" to help him die. — AFP

There should be a law against people who abuse the Internet! And to think the guy is a computer technician - what an insult to our community!

Howdy everybody, so how did your Raya go? Mine went alright I guess, but somehow this year's Raya wasn't as meriah as usual.

For one thing, the hols went by soooo quickly! At the speed of lightning, really! I mean, look at me now - back in the office, tons of articles not done yet, brain still fuzzy, blogging away like I own the company. Things are back to normal, you say? Pretty much, but not quite.

The truth is, I'm still reeling over the shock from the reunion of RPSian I attended back on the fourth of Syawal. Imagine yourself as a gal of the new millenium - just a bit over a quarter of a century old, happily single, having an OK-lah-jugak career - attending a Raya gathering of schoolmates.

So they say you looked different. That's OK, after all some of them you have not met since SPM ended. So to them you said, "Hey, you looked good too!"

So they asked what are you doing now. That's OK too, cause it's not like you're a bum eating off your Ma and Pa's pension money. So to them you said, "I'm doing alright, just like you."

So they asked if you're hitched yet. Still OK, cause you are, as you said, happily single - out to see the world, venture new hobbies, spend money on frivolous stuff like Shopaholic novels and contemporary theatre. Then, being the typical Malay who sees good in being peramah you make the mistake - you asked, "What about you?"

Lightning flash, thunder strikes. There's no turning back now.

Yati said she's getting married soon, in fact here's the invitation card.

Another Yati said she's engaged - getting married soon, early next year to be precise and she'll pass you a card once the printing's all done.

Next to the two Yatis, Zura said her man's mom had already gave her a cincin tanda she's going to get engaged soon.

Ayu said she's got someone and serious plannings are taking place between the two families - she's not gonna be someone's fiancee too long and that marriage's a good thing (She: You know what I mean? (chuckle, chuckle). You: I see, I see..).

A couple more girls who used to play Zero Point and galah panjang with you after school also passed invitation cards to their respective weddings. Whoa, December's gonna be a busy month!

And just when you thought the storm was finally over, life is more like the movies than you thought. You know that part where the bad guy resurfaced for one last assault on the hero/heroine? Well, as it turned out the day will not get sunshine that easily.

A call came from a friend who could not join us - she was sooo sorry she could not make it. "Actually I am already married nikah only la - so I have to follow my hubby. But we haven't had the kenduri yet so please let everyone know that the feast will be held on Dec 20th. Datang ye!"

A few single gals in the crowd can be seen puffing for air at this time. What? Another invitation! The horror of it all! And that's discounting all the news about who's
1) already married
2) already pregnant
3) already a mother (biologically or through instant promotion)
4) already a mother several times!

I supposed the only consolation to this whole 'news update' part of the reunion is that no one I know was getting a divorce! And that news from Sari about her dating a guy 5 years her junior was quite motivating, sort of, albeit still depressing.

The few singles, while puffing for air desperately like fish out of water, tried to change the topic, but to no avail. Once the word marriage is out, what else follows but more talks on the cost of catering, choices for hantaran goodies, famous songket dress makers, weird mak andam tales, and plans for honeymoon. Wow now, how exciting.

Tell me do you guys face this sort of thing too or the torture is restricted to girls only?


p/s: The first Raya that's different from the ones before is always tough. It does not become easier on the next Raya or the one after that and after that, but it will be more tolerable as time goes by. Being far from the family is also another tough experience but later when you're back, be damned if you don't appreaciate them more then, right.